The details of Rachel Leviss’ revelation that she believed she was ‘stupid’ before being diagnosed with ADHD
Rachel Leviss recently shared her story of being diagnosed with undiagnosed ADHD during childhood on her podcast, Rachel Goes Rogue. She explained that the change in status after receiving a diagnosis was profound for her.
Leviss, 29 years old, reflected on her school years and pointed out that they were very difficult. She said, “I always just thought I was stupid because I couldn’t pass my multiplication tables test, and I couldn’t read as well as the other kids in class,” the Vanderpump Rules alum said. “I just thought I wasn’t intelligent.”
It was not until college that Leviss was formally diagnosed with inattentive ADHD, a common form of ADHD marked by problems with attention and concentration, the ability to complete tasks, and organization.
Rachel Leviss talks about ADHD Diagnosis: ‘It was like living with an invisible disability’
When Rachel Leviss found out that she had ADHD, she noted that getting a diagnosis felt like she had been living with a disability that was invisible to her her entire life. She found out that a diagnosis allowed her take charge of her situation, get appropriate support, and improve her life.
“I realized that I had been living with an invisible disability my whole life,” she said. “Once I was diagnosed, I was able to take control of my life a little bit more and to get the accommodations that I needed to succeed in school. That truly was life-changing for me.”
During her podcast episode titled Rachel Goes Rogue, Leviss introduced listeners to the process of masking with the help of Paige Layle, an autistic and ADHD activist. Most people wear masks when interacting in public, and this could reduce the chance of an AS person being as he or she is.
“When you mask, you’re unable to be authentically yourself,” Leviss said. “You just process things a different way, and you’ve worked your whole life taking in data from other people and figuring out what the social norms are and, you know, shifting things inside of yourself to present a certain way so that you could survive socially,” Layle, author of But Everyone Feels This Way: How an Autism Diagnosis Saved My Life, explained about masking.
Leviss described how masking affects one’s ability to be genuine, while Layle, author of But Everyone Feels This Way: Sharing their experience of masking, How an Autism Diagnosis Saved My Life, went deeper into explaining that masking is about constantly fitting into society and changing oneself to survive in it.
Rachel Leviss opens up about masking
Leviss explained that masking, although it is helpful to protect oneself and others, also erases people’s true selves. She explained that masking puts you in front of a persona that you think people wish to meet, which, in essence, hinders them from addressing one another.
“When you do that, it does keep you safe, but it also takes away your authenticity,” she said. “You become lost and, like, you’re presenting yourself in the way that you think other people need to perceive you.”
Leviss was aware of the fact that she was unable to be herself and pretended to be someone she was not for quite some time just to stay alive. For this reason, she lost touch with many of her friends because she was pretending to be someone she was not.
“And, like, to be safe, I needed to not be myself, whoever that person was. I’ll just be what it looks like everyone wants me to be. Then how could I not be safe? But then I had so many connections that weren’t real at all,” she continued. “Because I wasn’t real.”
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